Sacrificing For the Good of Others

MOMMA,     

"YOU'VE HAD A BIRTHDAY SHOUT HURRAY!  I’D LIKE TO SING TO YOU TODAY!  ONE YEAR OLDER (but really 40 years younger) AND WISER (not so wise but crazy spunky energetic and fun) TOO, HAAAAPPYY BIRTHDAY, TO YOOOOOOUUUUUU!!!!!!!!"

      I remembered your birthday momma, and will be sending you a little something I made this next week.

      That is pretty crazy to hear about your 18th Century French Book Bindery!!  I got a little Giddy thinking about being able to bind my own books filled with stories, wisdom, thoughts, principles, doctrines and poems.  It sounds WAY COOL! :)

      Well I just realized that Bug is out of school.  Crazy!  I’m so glad he is going to EFY ("Especially For Youth" Church Camp for youth 14 to 18 years of age), An opportunity I wish I had taken.

      You guys make me so proud.  I must say, "You guys are not bland parents."  I Could not handle such boring parents.  Yours and dads energy, spunkyness, differences and weirdness makes everything way fun :)

      I’m doing well this week.  I love this work and I know it's true.  I know my Heavenly Father lives and loves me.  I'm so thankful for what Christ has done for me.  I love the Spirit.  Ahhh, the Spirit is so Great.  :) This is true, and I believe it so much.

      Did you get my letter about faith yet?  I also sent a micro SD card with a lot of photos on it.  I hope you get it soon.

With much love, your Darling Baby in Africa.

Elder Landon Gold

DADIO!



      Man a Celo Europa (old school road bike)?  Honestly, I think I know what that is.  That is so sick though.  I miss my bike so much I must say.  I miss you too.  I hope that when I get back we can hit the roads and trails on motors, bikes and feet.  Then, hit the water on boards. :p  

Remember when you and I went to the movies in New York and saw ‘War of the Worlds’?  Then we walked back to the hotel in the pouring rain?  Yeah, that is a good memory I thought I would share. 

      So, this week has been hard.  My new companion and I are not faring well together. We just aren’t making a friendship.  It has been a difficult situation, so I thought I would share this with you because you were once on a mission and had many companions that, I’m sure, you did not see eye to eye with at times.  I know you had many foreign companions just like mine.  Hee hee, mine is from the very foreign place of Utah.  So maybe you have some advice.  On a good note, I have really learned a principle that you master: sacrificing yourself for the good of the other, the good of the situation, or just to make things a little less tense.  I never understood it growing up, but now I think I’m beginning to realize just how important these communication skills really are.  So, thanks for the shining example.  :) 



      I’m also glad to hear that Bug is going to EFY.  That will be life changing for him.  If I may say, thank you Dad, for leading our family in righteous ways.  There are SOOO many, TOOO many who do not enjoy the blessing that I do of having a father like you. I hope to be like you when I’m a father.  But, most importantly, DON'T GET ELIMINATED!!!


I love you tremendously Dad! 


Your Son and Elder, 


      Elder Gold

Editor’s Note:

            It was very interesting to read the two letters sent from our son this week.  The one addressed to Momma showed no signs of a difficult time and was rather positive and upbeat.  On the other hand, the letter his father received proceeded to give a bit of insight to the challenges of a young missionary learning to live with a new companion.  As I read the words: “this week has been hard, we aren’t making a friendship, and, it has been a difficult situation,” I questioned just how the Lord takes young men, who have barely stepped into society as adults, and brings them together to make it work.  The challenge of having to live with a stranger and learn to love him as a brother, no matter your differences, is unfathomable.  However, further insight came through Landon’s declaration that, “I have really learned a principle that you (Dad) master: sacrificing yourself for the good of the other, the good of the situation, or just to make things a little less tense.”  Through analyzing his fathers refined communication skills and knowing that “Being patient and agreeable is not the same as being weak,” Landon is gaining a better understanding of how to get along, even in those tough situations.  I now realize that through the self-same-sacrifices 30-plus years ago, as Steve served his two-year mission, a gift had been granted.  He had learned the power and strength of a gentle, guiding hand.  This has helped our family through many rough patches.  As we continue to live through the trials of parenting a teenager who demands his freedom but does not always want the responsibility that accompanies that freedom, we are fortunate to have a balance in our parenting techniques.  I, having been raised in a military family, tend to stand my ground in a disagreement as if the enemy needs to be stopped in its tracks and forced into compliance.  On the other hand, Steve tends to have a gentler approach.  Here is his view given in a letter as advice to his son: 

“I share this with you to emphasize the intensity of our family dynamics right now.  It’s not always “peace on earth”.  But we deal with it because we love Jordan and want to see him improve and succeed.  When it gets real bad, your mother sometimes wants to “lay down the law”, using grounding as the punishment and even taking away his car keys.  I’m more inclined to work with Jordan, to coax him into wanting to improve.  I see your mother’s approach as if Jordan were an ocean liner sailing in the wrong direction and she sends out a battleship to block his path. When the ocean liner collides with the battleship, there will be damage.  The impact is instant and the damage is great. My approach is different. I’m more like a little tugboat that tries to guide the ocean liner, nudging it in the right direction.  My little tugboat takes longer to alter that path of the ocean liner than does the battleship, but the damage is minimal and eventually, I hope, the ocean liner will be headed in the right direction under its own power.  Who’s to say which approach is best…”

As I read this letter I looked to our Heavenly Father’s example of parenting and asked myself, “By what manner does He guide me?”  The answer was clear, “By a gentle and loving hand.”  The ultimate goal is for us all to be on a correct path traveling in the right direction . . . and under our own power.  If we can proceed in this manner without taking a course of action that endangers ourselves or others we should have our agency, our freedom to choose.  As a parent, however, I see certain pathways as dangerous and actions, quite possibly out of control.  It is in these situations that I want to force my own will to correct them.  I am learning the importance of not intervening with every move that may appear to carry its passenger to dangerous waters.  In some parenting situations, however, those dangerous pathways are ignored and then, when damage is done, society must intervene with those laws to protect.  It is our duty as parents to help our children learn the importance of self-mastery and to discover the greater blessings found in becoming responsible to those choices they make.  It is with this free agency we can learn to understand just how our potential for happiness becomes ours to achieve; fathoming the depths of our choices and the heights to which we can climb.  Knowing these truths and seeing the example of a father and son striving to bring peace to their world, I find calm waters even during the storm.  Oh, how grateful I am to have someone at my side that, through his own sacrifices years ago, has learned to patiently guide us through these rough waters and steer us in the right direction.